4th of July Fashion—Do’s (and Doo-doos)

Posted On June 30, 2010

The 4th of July will be here before we know it — Have you planned YOUR wardrobe yet?

You may be one of those people who gets all decked out for the 4th, and if so, I’m envious. I just can’t pull it off. Bedecked head-to-toe in red, white, and blue is way too conspicuous for me. Makes me nervous just thinking about it. My personality is much more under-the-radar.

However, just because I can’t go all out doesn’t mean I don’t want to be patriotic. So I’ve been searching the web to see what I could find that’s a bit more subtle. I also found some things that you won’t be seeing me in this coming weekend. First, let’s explore those . . .

Although I totally admire the intricate details of this denim jacket, it’s just not me. Way too flashy for this body. However, if it’s you, go for it, girl! You can order it here.

Had I this woman’s body, I would definitely strut around the local pool in this bikini. Maybe even the parade. It’s retro-cute — but not on this mom-of-three. If you could actually wear this without making a fool of yourself, up yours, I mean, order it here!

I’m pretty sure it would be impossible to blend in with the crowd in this hand-painted shirt. If you want to get noticed (and you will, you definitely will), get yours here!

Hmmm, even if I could fit into a backless, peekaboo belly halter top, I don’t know if I would. Fortunately for the world, it will never be an option. If it’s an option for you, pick up your own here.

Now, I think this puffy shirt is super cute. However, it made my “won’t wear it” list for other reasons: 1) It’s too dressy. The 4th of July celebration we attend isn’t exactly a dress-up affair. 2) I’m pretty sure that long tie would cause serious injury when it got caught in the gears of the Tilt-a-Whirl.

Again with the conspicuous. Instead of blatant patriotism, I prefer my patriotism to go a little more incognito. If you like yours loud and proud, order your jewelry here.

So just what will Miss Pickypants wear, you may be thinking? Don’t worry. I’m not that hard to please. Here’s what you could see me in (if I had the funds to do more than just window-shop) . . .

This piece of jewelry is a bit less “in-your-face” patriotic than others I’ve seen. I’d definitely wear George Washington around my neck. (Pick up George here.)

If  it’s possible to be in love with a powder wig pendant, count me as guilty. So stinkin’ cute in a 18th-century-retro kind of way. Get your own wig here.

What’s more patriotic than the Declaration of Independence? I mean, without it, the 4th of July would just be another day. So even though this T-shirt doesn’t sport the red, white, and blue, it doesn’t have to. Want to declare your indpendence? Get the shirt here.

I love the irony of this T-shirt. I would love to see how long it took people to “get it.” Plus, I think it’s pretty darn true. If you want to “get it,” get it here.

I think Thomas Jefferson looks a little sexy here. Claim Tommy for yourself here.

Okay, I realize this is a dress, but it’s a T-shirt dress, so that doesn’t really count as being “dressy.” Baby might have too much back for this dress, but if it didn’t cling in all the wrong places, I’d totally wear it. (Find it here.)

I’m a word nerd, so this T-shirt from Target speaks to me. It says, “Can’t you please take me home? I’m less than 10 bucks for crying out loud!”

A few other 4th of Julyish items of apparel worth mention . . .

If I had a girl, I would totally dress her in this for the parade. Doesn’t it look like fireworks? If you have a little girl to dress up all cute-like, well aren’t you special? go ahead, buy the dress and shatter my dreams buy it here. Go on, I insist.

If I had a boy, I’d dress him in this. Oh, wait . . . (Get your own here.)

My pet peeve: Shirts that have the year on them, like “July 4, 2010.” Why? Because they suck as hand-me-downs. I still have a 4th of July T-shirt that says, “Old Navy 2002,” but if I make one of the boys wear it to the parade, does it not scream, “THIS SHIRT HAS BEEN THROUGH AT LEAST 3 OTHER KIDS BEFORE ME”? That’s why I love this shark shirt. It’s cute, clever, and timeless. (Find it here.)

For another hand-me-down-worthy holiday shirt, order this one from an adorable shop called Crowsmack. Even the name makes me smile.

So what about you? Is your 4th of July fashion style more extrovert or introvert? What will you be wearing to the parade?