6 Reasons I Will Not Win Mother of the Year Today
Posted On June 23, 2009
1. Dirty clothes have now taken over the laundry room so that I can only open the door a crack and then have to scoot sideways to enter. For every 1 load I wash and dry, my family has produced 3 new loads that need to be done . . .
2. Boy #2 has the biggest blisters I have EVER seen on his shoulders because the sunscreen I put on him Saturday morning apparently either didn’t work at all, or only provided protection for approximately 3 minutes. I would show you pictures, but I’m fairly certain they could be used against me in a court of law when DHS comes to take my kids away.
3. Hypothetical question: Is it bad if you can’t remember last time your 4-year-old took a bath? Why do I ask? No reason . . .
4. Apparently it is my fault that Boy #1 had to practice baseball with his All-Stars team in 100-degree heat for an hour today. I can’t decide if I’m to blame for creating heat, though, or for cursing him with exceptional baseball skills.
5. I caught Boys #2 and #3 creating Mii’s for the Wii—and then using the cursor/arrow to click on the Miis’ privates while saying, “I’m touching your penis!”
6. Remembering to put cortisone cream on Boy #3’s leg rash twice a day is obviously just too damn hard.
Ahh, another day, another chance to get it right—right?