Bite-Sized Boogers and Burps

Ooh, that title sounds kind of nasty, doesn’t it? Ah, well, such is my life.

Since it is now 2 a.m. and I desperately need some sleep but want to let my peeps know what’s been happening around these parts, I’m going to give you snippets of my day:

  • Woke up with yet ANOTHER low-grade fever. People, it’s been off and on now for something like 3 weeks! Had bloodwork done a couple weeks ago–all normal. Then why must I feel like I’ve been run over by a garbage truck every cotton-pickin’ day? The Internets didn’t help either. According to my trusted online sources, I either have Rat Bite Fever (I kid you not) or cancer. How comforting.
  • After coughing the ENtire night, Boy #1 got up for the day at 4:15 a.m. and asked me to come downstairs with him and watch TV. Being the mean mom I am, I said no. Poor guy coughed all morning until his chest was completely sore. Finally got into the doctor at 2:00. Bad case of bronchitis. Prescribed antibiotic, steroid, and strong cough medicine. Nebulizer treatment when we got home. Winter has officially arrived.
  • Fortunately, my lovely sister picked up Boy #2 for school this morning since I was feeling like garbage. In typical Boy #2 fashion, he was running late and we couldn’t find his coat. Did I mention that it’s like 20 degrees out and there’s snow covering the ground? So I ran to the basement (while my sister sat in the driveway) and grabbed his older brother’s old coat which is about two sizes too big. Still can’t find the coat…
  • Too tired to take Boy #3 all the way across town to daycare so let him stay home with us sickies. Late morning I noticed that the black turtleneck he was wearing had a huge hole in the front. HUGE. I could see his entire abdomen. When I asked him what happened to his shirt, how did he respond? “It broke.” Of course. It couldn’t have anything to do with the pair of scissors I found out of their drawer coincidentally lying right where he was playing…Nope. It just “broke.” I hate it when that happens.
  • In the midst of trying to make lunch while feeling yucky and listening to one of my son’s hack up a lung and another whine “I want cereal!!!”, I got a phone call. This is how it went down.
    Me: Hello?
    Strange Woman: Hi. How are you?
    Me: Okay. How are you? (Wondering if I should know this person whose voice I can’t recall)
    Strange Woman: We we just sitting here talking about if things will get better someday. Do you think God will make everything better someday?
    Me: Uh, yeah…
    Strange Woman: Yeah, me too. I know that God’s going to come back and make the world better. And we were just reading from the Bible about it. Do you read the Bible?
    Me: Uh, yeah…
    Strange Woman: Oh, good! Do you mind if I share some of these scriptures with you? About the end times? Do you have time?
    Me: Yeah, not really. Because I have no idea who you are but I’m pretty sure you’re a wacko I have a sick child I’m taking care of.
    Strange Woman: Would you mind if I called you back another time then?
    Me: Go away, crazy lady!!!Uh, okay. (I am SUCH a pushover.)
    Strange Woman: Great! And what is your name?
    Me: Paula (Seriously?!? She didn’t even know who she was calling? Did she just pick up the phone and dial a random number to start preaching to? Or does this have something to do with my friend the Jehovah’s Witness? Note to self: Do NOT drink the red Kool-Aid if offered!)

Must go to bed. Good news! All is silent. No coughing to be heard. Better get some sleep while I can…

10 thoughts on “Bite-Sized Boogers and Burps”

  1. Bless your heart! I hope you all get better, soon! That’s crazy about the phone call. UGH! I hope they don’t harrass ya.

  2. Please call your doctor again today. We have no history of rat bite fever in our family, but cancer is another story.
    Take care of you.
    you know who

    PS Evidently the Jehovah Witnesses have retooled their campaign.

  3. I’ll pray for you in a non-crazy anti-koolaid way! You should have invited her over to see all your blessings and spread (cough, cough) the love!

  4. When your doctor ran your bloodwork, did he test your thyroid? I wouldn’t normally be so forward as to suggest anything, but I had the same thing for about a year and all my bloodwork came back normal. Finally, my OB/GYN tested my thyroid and the results showed that I had a mild form of hypothyroidism. They gave me some pills and it went away.

    Hope all is well!

  5. Thanks for all the well wishes so far this morning! And chrissyrudd, so nice to meet you! I think you’re right; next time she calls I’ll ask her over, and then maybe say, “You wouldn’t mind watching the boys for a few hours while I go Christmas shopping, would ya? K, thanks!”

    K-Mom, how funny you should mention “thyroid” to me. My thyroid and I go way back. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis (autoimmune disease and hypothyroidism) after Boy #2 was born and I felt like DEATH. Then last year somehow I also developed Graves’ Disease (hyperthyroidism). So a year ago they “killed” my thyroid via radioactive iodine. But this very well may have something to do with my thyroid because there are all sorts of other “fun” things that go along with autoimmune thyroid disease. They’re just so hard to diagnose, so it makes it extra fun! But thank you for asking–it makes me feel good that you’re looking out for my health down South!

  6. You know how you solve the problem of strange scripture-spewing phone calls? Two words: CALLER ID. Of course, if you’re like me, the curiosity of wondering who is calling from the unrecognizable number wins out and you answer the phone anyway. But at least you know to ignore any calls from that number next time!

  7. I hope you and the boys get better soon. Three weeks is a long time to be sick, I would definitely have them look at you again.

  8. Between hippy gypsies and strange phoners who don’t even look at the names, you have some odd characters in Iowa. . 🙂
    Hope you all feel better!!

  9. Rat Bite fever? Interesting…

    I hope you are feeling better! It is never fun when you don’t know what is going on.

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