It’s a Bird, It’s a Plane…

By the end of the week, I MAY be wearing a SuperMom cape.

Just so ya know.

Today was the beginning of a hectic week for me as I attempt to juggle it all. Momhood. Work. Church. This morning, I began by playing the role of caddy. Which in my case meant just carrying around Boy #1’s bag that must’ve weighed 40 pounds in 90-degree heat because I am not really what you’d call “qualified” to give out golf advice. In fact, Boy #1 said to me, “Do you want me to give you advice about what advice you should give me?” First I laughed. Then I said, “Yes.”

So I walked 9 holes watching my eldest play in his first golf tournament of the season. Which, by the way, is NOT easy for me to do. I’ve got what you’d call “issues” when it comes to the pressure of competition, and when it involves one of my kids, it’s way worse. But of course I can’t let it show because I don’t want my kids to feel the same way I do! So I just smile and keep recycling the only advice I know. “Keep your head down! Follow through all the way to the hole! Just relax and have fun!”

And I do stifle the urge to yell “You’re the man!” after he hits his drive. I’m sure he appreciates that.

After 2 1/2 hours of golf that included a 245-yard drive, two “10”s, one “3” for par, at least 6 ball/tree collisions, and a run-in with the gentlest looking bird that my son was sure was waiting to peck him as soon as he reached for his ball, Boy #1 ended up with a 61. Hey, I’m thrilled if I get a 61 on 9 holes, but apparently if you’re 10 and a better golfer than your mom, this isn’t something to write home about. In fact, it will get you last place in your age group. Last. Granted, there were only 6 other boys, but still…Last. Don’t you hate it when your kid tries so hard and wants it so badly and then ends up with …last? Don’t get me wrong, it is soooo good for him to experience disappointment and defeat; practice good sportsmanship; and realize that there are things to be learned, shots to be practiced, and fun to be had along the way, no matter how you finish. But that doesn’t stop me from feeling bad for my oldest baby boy. I know last doesn’t feel good. I was very proud of the way he handled it, though. After his initial reaction of saying “I suck!” he was able to deliver genuine congratulations to the other boys and reflect on what good practice this was for Thursday.

Oh yeah, Thursday. When he plays in the Iowa Games tournament. And I’ll be schlepping around his clubs for 9 more holes…But there’s no one I’d rather be handing clubs to. Not even Tiger.

Along with my job as a caddy and my job-that-pays-me-to work as an editor, I am also volunteering with Vacation Bible School this week. Monday through Thursday, 6:00 to 8:30 p.m. Five 3- and 4-year-olds and me. Plus one more girl who I inherited after she wouldn’t stop crying for her leader.

I’m exhausted.

I love preschoolers, I really do. I teach Sunday School to 3- and 4-year-olds and love their honesty, innocence, and wide-eyed view of life. But 2 1/2 hours with 3-year-olds who are most likely up past their bedtime got to be a little bit much tonight. At one point there were six of us in the bathroom together, both boys and girls, and I was going from stall to stall pulling up pants and wiping bottoms all the while shouting, “No one leave the bathroom until we’re all done!”

And yet, somehow, the kids managed to learn about Jesus. And I managed to learn a bit from the kids as well! “Jesus lives in a cage! God lives in a cage too, but he can get out.”

God bless 3-year-olds!

Well, now that I’ve stayed up past midnight trying to enlighten and entertain the masses, it’s time to go to bed so I can get up in the morning and fact yet another long day. Pick up Jake, the world’s best baby-sitter. Bring Jake back to our house. Go to work all day. Come home. Snarf down some food. Go to VBS. Come home. Put kids in bed. Work on my blog. Stay up way too late. Fall into bed.

Wednesday, I get to squeeze in our Moms & Tots Tumbling class with Boy #3 from 5:00 to 5:30 after work and before VBS at 6:00. And Thursday, I will be taking the day off for the Iowa Games. (Tell me the truth—is it wrong for me to pray that my kid not get last place again? It is? Oh, okay. I was just kidding then.)

And then Friday I’ll work and—finally—the weekend. Where I can kick back and relax with nothing to do. Except for that church meeting on Saturday morning… and preparing to teach Sunday School…and cleaning my house…and catching up on laundry…

Oh well. I can rest when I’m dead, right? Right?!

9 thoughts on “It’s a Bird, It’s a Plane…”

  1. Yes, our work is never done. Can your son not use a pull cart? Sometimes you can get those pretty cheap.

    I have to say, if I shot a 61 I would be ecstatic. My score card usually read 10+ for every hole and I am way older than 10.

    I feel like I need to get my seven year old out on the course now. I mean he has to pay for college somehow.

    Have fun with VBS. You must have more patience than I.

  2. “You’re the Man!” momof3boys!!
    It’s good to see that you’re taking my advice about dropping a few activities and simplifing 🙂 BUT I am so proud that you are caddying for Boy #1…it not only gives you precious one on one time with Boy #1, but gives you a chance to showcase your athletic prowess that sooo is in your genes.
    Have a peachy day!

  3. melody, I thought we couldn’t use pull carts, but then of course other kids were using them. Leave it up to me to FOLLOW THE RULES! Yes, I think you’d better get your kid out hitting balls. At least 3 hours a night. I mean, Tiger started when he was two! 🙂

    momof3ps, yes, athletic prowess definitely describes me. I just figure it’s good exercise, which we all know I need, and I’m hoping I maybe sweat off a pound or two!

  4. Sorry about your son getting last place, but glad you had such a great attitude towards the other boys. I hope things work out better for him on Thursday!

    Good luck with VBS & your other million tasks! I’m tired just reading about it! lol

  5. I totally get how you feel. We all want our kids to be great at things. And I don’t want my daughter learning my habits…such as that if I’m not fairly good at something from the first time out, I don’t want to do it again. You miss out on a lot that way.

    I love that you are caddying for him. What a great way to spend some time with him. Same with tumbling. I wish we had stuff like that here…gymboree or something. You rock!

  6. mom of two princesses, thanks for the good luck wishes for Thursday. I’ll let you know how it turns out!

    groovyteach, I know, it’s cool to have these opportunities here in the “city,” but I also miss the laid-back pace of small-town Iowa, so it’s definitely a toss up. I really don’t think I rock, but thank you for boosting my ego anyway! You rock being a full-time HS English teacher (Believe me, I know how tough a gig that is!)mom, and wife!

  7. Well, as Boy #l’s golf coach I must just say I am very proud of him. That isn’t that bad for a course he never plays and for the fact that the others grew up on a golf course and have the opportunity to play every day. I was proud that he only had 2 putts except for one hole. That shows me as a coach he has been listening to my advice.Last year it was 3 or more every hole. Now, if I could have him all summer and we could golf 2 or 3 rounds a day he would be much better. He loves the game and I have had him out there since he was about 3 yrs. old. He is a natural…he just needs to practice. I am real sure that I couldn’t have done better on a course I don’t know. In fact, he out drives me most of the time on our course. I love teaching him because he listens and tries what I tell him. Now, Boy #2 listens and then says grandma can I just do it my way! 🙂 After carrying the clubs in 90 degree weather for 9 holes, do you see why I hestitated? Sportsmanship is very important. He handles himself extremely well for a 10 yr. old. I think it was good for you to spend the day with him doing something he loves. I must say I am very proud of him. But seriously, you need to slow down and not try to do SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much. We already call you super mom!

  8. That’s what they say. I’ll believe it when we get there. 😉

    Aren’t all moms super by definition? lol.

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