Wanted: New (to me) Car

I’m not picky, really. Just would like a vehicle that would run for at least one month before breaking down again. Especially on the busiest street in town, in the middle of construction. When I can’t pull off to the side, and no one can go around me. I would prefer NOT to back up traffic for a mile while sitting with my flashers on, unable to move.

If we could fit all five of us in the car, that would be a bonus. Although I could be talked into strapping someone to the roof.

Having a window that rolls down would be nice, but isn’t a necessity. I’ve perfected the art of pulling up slightly past the drive-thru window, just enough so I can open the door, swivel my body to the side and back just a smidge, and grab my McDonald’s sack. Husband apparently hasn’t perfected this skill. Either that or he still has some pride left.

Color? Not an issue. White, black, orange, pink with purple polka-dots. I dream of the day when I will stay up all night trying to decide between Pebble Beach Tan and Sunbeam Gold. I would even drive a car with your logo on it, if you’d like. Scotty’s Sump Pump Service — Your Sh!t is our bread & butter? Not a problem. I’m sure Boy #1 wouldn’t mind getting dropped off at middle school in that.

And a windshield without a crack all the way across would be nice too. The cop that pulled me over last week would probably appreciate it. Obstructing my line of vision? Whatever.

I will try really hard not to either back into a garbage can and break out the taillight (me, twice), or back into an ice-packed snowback and push in the rear bumper (Husband). But I can’t make any promises.

Interior-wise, I don’t really care if it’s leather or cloth. If it doesn’t include melted-on crayons and Skittles on the seats or red Gatorade stains on the carpet, I’ll be ecstatic.

Let’s see . . . anything else?

Oh, yeah, almost forgot . . .

Will pay with Pokémon cards.

Husband and I collecting our keys from the salesman after handing him our stack of Pokemon cards. See how happy we look? (And I've lost some weight!)
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